A Single Southern Guy in America

June 26, 2004

Hello There!

Hi! I'm new around here. Adam got really, really drunk one night and offered me the chance to guest-blog on his site. I accepted the offer after I dragged his face out of that puddle of puke he fell asleep in on the bathroom floor.

Adam's a nice fellow. But just looking around his house, I can see why he's a Single Southern Guy. This place is as neat as a pin. Adam doesn't need a woman in his life. I need HIM in MINE. Bejus! Adam, come scrub my kitchen and show me how to operate my new carpet cleaner.

What's he got to drink around here? Hmmm... no beer in the refrigerator. Just bottled water and... what's this? ORGANIC PRUNES??? UUUGGGGH!!! I don't want any of those and I'm not sure I want to see Adam's bathroom, either. I'll just piss in his kitchen sink if I have to go.

The bedroom looks nice. Freshly made bed, candles on the nightstands and an inflatable sex-toy stored neatly in the corner. That doll could use a little air to shape it out, but at first glance, I thought it was a MALE DOLL. That can't be, but I am unable to see for sure because the doll is stuck to the wall with something that appears to be dried Elmer's glue-all. I don't think I want to touch that thing.

What's this over the bed? HOLY BEJUS! It's a picture of eric, all greased-up like a bodybuilder and wearing nothing but a red thong and a gag-ball on a leather strap. He's blindfolded in that picture, too. Damn! Are those REAL handcuffs?

I'm going to check the closets next...

Posted by Acidman at June 26, 2004 10:07 PM ~ Link Cosmos | Trackbacks (1)
Straight White Guy linked with True Lust...

Comments

..quit your bitching, Acidman... you're just jealous....

Posted by: Eric at June 27, 2004 08:31 PM

Oh I'm going to bet Adam is really going to regret EVER getting drunk enuf to give you keys to his blog!! *L*

Posted by: michele at June 28, 2004 05:55 AM

Oh!! OH!!

Check under his bed. Also in his medicine cabinet.

I wanna know what is there.

Posted by: OhWiseAssedOne at June 28, 2004 02:12 PM

Friends definitely do not let friends blog drunk. You did an upstanding thing, saving Adam from a life changing and potentially tragic accident.

Posted by: soyunperdedor at June 28, 2004 08:31 PM

Admit it..you're Adam's other personality, aren't you? There is no "friend."

Posted by: teahouseblossom at June 30, 2004 07:48 AM