A Single Southern Guy in America

July 16, 2003

I've Been Out-ed

It was bound to happen then one night it did Garth Brooks, 'Papa Loved Mama'

As BreakUpBabe put it yesterday:

Security Has Been Breached!

I knew a few friends were looking at the humble ole blog. I knew a certain lady was trying to find it. Last night at the pub, I realized one of the very few local friends (BFH) I have shared this site with, has passed the address around.

Lesson learned. Message Received.

I immediately considered the same issues BreakUpBabe dealt with when she discovered she had been found. I offered my two cents worth advice in her comments about her situation. Suddenly, I was faced with a near identical situation and having already dispensed advice, was in a position to put my money where my mouth is. To wit, I offered BreakUp Babe this:

I suppose I would ask him not to read it, but then again, we know how well that worked last time. All I ask is that if you do move, let all your loyal readers/linkers know, but make us NOT link to you at first. If he's smart enough to find you in a google, he's smart enough to go to your linkers and find you again! Keep us posted!

I regret not putting more thought into it before I offered advice. It might have been easier for me to consider my options.

Keep on reading to find out what I figured out.

With my continued quest to find "The One" and in keeping with the model of a Southern Gentleman, I am obliged to stick to my word. I will.

I will continue Helping Folks Out© and NotDating™. I will continue reporting on the quest, commenting on various issues, and linking, linking, linking. For example, you will hear in the near future about my next broken heart--the blonde who continually exchanged glances with me as I wrote these words, even as a gaggle of guys tried desperately to pick her up only to have her leave, but not before talking to me. You'll still hear on occasion about my ongoing crush on DMD. You'll hear less about me Helping T Out©, as that liaison is going no further.

All that being said, I have some deeper reflections. This blog has grown by being what it is. It has evolved to what it is. I won't stop now. No, I won't back down. (props to Tom Petty).

In a sense, being out-ed is a blessing in disguise. Upon learning that BFH had passed it around, I decided she will be the first one the Yeti gets to talk to in our new project.

This development has taught me something about having a public blog. Inevitably, the offline relationships and the online content will eventually meet. Twice it has happened to BreakUpBabe in the almost a year that she has been writing. It took me six months to learn how manyfolks I know offline are reading mine. I've met other bloggers in real life and loved them. The construct of offline relationships and online content has changed to relationships on and offline. When I meet other bloggers, I find that I can tell them some things that I wouldn't have wrote for all the world to see. Now we have on and offline content. The lines blur ever more.

The world continues changing. Increasingly, our online persona are meeting are offline selves. Depending on how much you veer from your self in your writings, it can be an easy transition or cataclysmic collision. I tend to gravitate to other bloggers who seem to be honest and straightforward in their writing. In the future, unless you hide yourself extremely well, you will have to be your honest self at all times. Soon, our fantasies and inside thoughts will return to their rightful place--in our own heads or shared with only a few close confidants. That is the only way to keep them from being broadcast over the internet and literally for the whole world to see.

Technology adapts, humans adapt. Our ability to express ideas have increased exponentially. We will never remain anonymous. That being the case, we should be honest and true at all times. We're not there yet--but it's coming. Until then, you can be honest or you can avail yourself of the world's momentary ignorance.

I'll stay honest.

Posted by Adam H at July 16, 2003 03:40 PM ~ Link Cosmos | Trackbacks (0)

Comments

Boy is it ever going to freak people out when they find out I'm an 86 year old grandmother.

Keep my secret?

Posted by: TheYeti at July 17, 2003 09:31 AM

This scares me...but know it's bound to happen. My blog is just one facet of the whole person I am, the complete person, flaws and all, and if people choose only to see that one side then so be it.
I do however try to respect privacy, though perhaps not quite enough. Thanks for the food for thought.

Posted by: brenda at July 17, 2003 10:46 AM